The Village…….

One of the many joys in my life are the reactions I get from my kids with my silly antics.  Like when I show them my progress in perfecting the Running Man (its a dance move) or when I purposely misuse trendy sayings or phrases.  Keep in mind my kids are 18 and 20, so I have to find SOMETHING to keep me entertained!

For the past few years during Christmas I have put up a small Christmas village.  You know the ones with the little village people, houses, stores, horse drawn carriages, etc?  A couple years ago  when my kids were at home because it was winter break I would text them asking, “What is happening in the village?”  They thought I was a nut. Sometimes they would play along and give me a silly story of what was happening in the village but most of the time they would ignore my texts, which for some reason made me laugh also.  Well………this year I decided to change it up and text THEM about what was happening in the village.  Below are the “Village Update” texts they received:

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12/10/17-Accident on the ice rink. Little Timmy had a pretty scary fall but he is ok. Minor fracture.

12/12/17-BREAKING NEWS! Robbery suspect on the loose!  Suspect broke into Mrs. Smith’s fruit store at approximately 2am Tuesday morning.  Eye witnesses have described the suspect as male approximately 5’6 to 5’7, some say he has blonde hair others say brown, some say he has a tattoo on his left arm and others say he wears a medical necklace.  There is a $500 reward for anyone who can find this robber. If you have any information please contact Sheriff Kates at 1-800-JEALOUS?

*After this text my son responded with-UNSUBSCRIBE

*The description of the robber describes both my kids and Kates is my hot bf’s last name.

12/13/17-Power Outage.  Cause of outage is unknown at this time. Village officials estimate power will return within 24 hours and ask that its citizens stay close to home until the power returns.  On a side note the robbery suspect who broke into Mrs. Smith’s fruit store is still at large although some villagers have said they have spotted him at the local watering hole.

12/17/17-Press Release-The robbery suspect has been found and detained.  Locals found him up north in a run down shack ice fishing.  The shack was filled with fruit. Sheriff Kates has declared that the Village may resume to its normal activities. BINGO AT THE LEGION HALL MONDAY NIGHT! Mrs.Migilicuddy will be serving her peach cobbler!

12/23/17-Village Gossip- On Saturday Charlene was at Brenda’s Beauty Salon getting a cut and color and she said that Nancy said that she saw Cindy’s husband sneaking away from that hussy Bobbie Sue’s house Tuesday afternoon.  Apparently Bobbie Sue’s husband is on a “business trip” but you know what they say about the kind of business he is in!  And this isn’t the first time Cindy’s husband has been caught in questionable circumstances with the other ladies in the village!

12/24/17-REMINDER- The Silver Fox bowling league is putting on a bake sale at the community center.  Come by and support the ladies by purchasing freshly baked goods.  Mrs. Smith always puts a little extra rum in her rum cake :).  Proceeds go towards a state of the art cat park behind the old barn on the Johnson property.  And best of all Sheriff Kates will be there to autograph photos!

12/26/17-Jumpstart on next year’s Christmas shopping with 50% off on fruitcakes at Behrman’s Bakery. Get them while they last!

12/30/17-A note from the editor: The staff (the editor) will be on a short hiatus and will return December 2018.

Wishing you joy and happiness for the year ahead 🙂

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